Well, I'll tell you a story
'Bout a girl who came my way
We upped and married
Three kids a dog in Sante Fe
Now she's gone, I'm by myself

I'm gonna join
A sentimental institution
I'm gonna pack
Pack all my little blues away
But I didn't stay left on the shelf

Mrs. Johnson from Wisconsin
She's a widow, plain to see
And Minnesota from Dakota
Likes the way I make her tea
Sweet as candy

I'm gonna join
A sentimental institution
No one to stop me
From playing Benny Goodman all day
So if you want romance
Just step my way
The band starts to play

I can thrill her with Glenn Miller
Or a song from Louis Armstrong
With Jim Dorsey or Arty Shaw
Know this magic can't go wrong

Old and lovely, she's so wealthy
But so ugly, I've gone crazy
Someone help me, do