Father says it, mother says it
Sister says it, brother says it
Uncle says it, Auntie says it
Everyone at the party says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The horse says it, the pig says it
The judge in his wig says it
The fox and the rabbit
And the nun in her habit says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

My mate Bill Gates says it
The President of the United States says it
The slacker and the worker
The girl in her burqa says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The general with his tank says it
The man at the bank says it
The soldier with his rocket
And the mouse in my pocket says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The drug-addled wreck
With a needle in his neck says it
The drunk says it, punk says it
The brave Buddhist monk says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

Hit me up, baby, and knock me down
Drop what you're doing and come around
We can hold hands till the sun goes down
Cause I know
That you
And I
Can be
Together
Cause I love you

The blind referee says it
The unlucky amputee says it
The giant killer bee
Landing on my knee says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The cop with his breathalyser
The paddy with his fertiliser
The man in the basement
That's getting a taste for it says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The fucked-up Rastafarian says it
The dribbling libertarian says it
The sweet little Goth
With the ears of cloth says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe' I'm on fire

The cross-over country singer says it
The hump-backed bell ringer says it
The swinger, the flinger
The outraged right-winger says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The man going hiking says it
The misunderstood Viking says it
The man at the rodeo
And the lonely old Eskimo says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

[Chorus]

The mild little Christian says it
The wild Sonny Liston says it
The pimp and the gimp
And the guy with the limp says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The blind piano tuner says it
The Las Vegas crooner says it
The hooligan mooner
Holding a schooner says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The Chinese contortionist says it
The backyard abortionist says it
The poor Pakistani
With his lamb Bhirriani says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The hopeless defendant says it
The toilet attendant says it
The pornographer, the stenographer
The fashion photographer says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The college professor says it
The vicious cross-dresser says it
Grandma and Grandpa
In the back of the car says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

[Chorus]

The hack at the doorstep says it
The midwife with her forceps says it
The demented young lady
Who is roasting her baby
On the fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The athlete with his hernia says it
Picasso with his Guernica says it
My wife with her furniture
Everybody!
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The laughing hyena says it
The homesick polish cleaner says it
The man from the Klan
With a torch in his hand says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The Chinese herbologist says it
The Christian apologist says it
The dog and the frog
Sitting on a log says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The foxhunting toff says it
The horrible moth says it
The doomed homosexual
With the persistent cough says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

[Chorus]

The Papist with his soul says it
The rapist on a roll says it
Jack says it, Jill says it
As they roll down the hill
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The clever circus flea says it
The sailor on the sea says it
The man from the Daily Mail
With his dead refugee says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The hymen-busting Zulu says it
The proud kangaroo says it
The koala, the echidna
And the platypus too says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The disgraced country vicar says it
The crazed guitar picker says it
The beatnik, the peacenik
The apparachick says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The deranged midnight stalker says it
Garcia Lorca says it
The hit man, Walt Whitman
And the haliototic talker says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

[Chorus]

The wine taster with his nose says it
The fireman with his hose says it
The pedestrian, the equestrian
The tap-dancer with his toes says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The beast in the beauty pageant
The pimply real estate agent
The beach-comber, the roamer
The girl in a coma says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The old rock'n'roller
With his two-seater stroller
And the fan in the van
With the abominable plan says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The menstruating Jewess says it
The nervous stewardess says it
The hijacker, the backpacker
The cunning safecracker says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The sports commentator says it
The old alligator says it
The tennis pro with his racquet
The loon in the straight jacket
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

[Chorus]

The butcher with his cleaver says it
The mad basket weaver says it
The jaded boxing writer
And the glass-jawed fighter says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The old town cryer says it
The inveterate liar says it
The pilchard, the bream
And the trout in the stream
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The war correspondent says it
The enthused and the despondent says it
The electrician, the mortician
And the man going fishin' says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The cattleman from Down Under says it
The patriot with his plunder says it
Watching a boat of full of refugees
Sinking into the sea
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The silicone junky says it
The corporate flunky says it
The Italian designer
With his rickshaw in China says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

[Chorus]

The trucker with his juggernaut says it
The lost astronaut says it
The share cropper, the bent copper
The compulsive shopper says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

The Viennese vampire says it
The cowboy round his campfire says it
The game show panellist
The Jungian analyst says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

Warren says it, Blixa says it
The lighting guy and mixer says it
Mick says it, Marty says it
Everyone at the party says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on Fire

The hairy arachnophobic says it
The scary agoraphobic says it
The mother, the brother
And the decomposing lover says
Babe, I'm on fire
Babe, I'm on fire

[Chorus]