(Helmer/Hogarth/Kelly/Mosley/Rothery/Trewavas)
Best of three, the angel said
As daylight burst behind his head
Jacob all night wrestling with his angel
Then out into the boul' St. Mich
He cruises in a new Corniche
Now doesn't God stand up for B-A-S-T-A-R-D-S

Baby you can't lose it
You'd be mad to choose it
Don't you know he was born to do you down
You can't cheat your fate girl
Check the time and date girl
Don't you know he was born to do you down

But guys who show how much they care
Try hard to please and get nowhere
You know that every girl round here got built-in bastard radar

Baby you can't lose it
You'd be mad to choose it
Don't you know he was born to do you down

'Cause what will be will always be
Though stinging kills the honey bee
You know that every girl on Earth's got built in bastard radar

I'm singing "one-two" in the mike
You know I'm testing
I'm singing "Death where is thy sting?"
It's only resting

And thank God every woman knows
It's piss and wind and fancy clothes
That make a man a man
Thank God for built-in bastard radar