I wore a shirt one day with a machine gun silhouette
Sportin’ a rainbow clip
I had this gun guy staring at me
Wondering where I got it
And he just about flipped over it!
I don’t know his name, yeah, but just the same
He buys a literal mountain of death
And I lost 5 or 6 bidding wars against him
Yeah, until I had no money left
I said until I had no money left
Yeah, until I had no money left
Oh!

I don’t want you getting hurt if you’re too disappointed
If the feathers are broken and dead
The birds look good in person
But not in the photos
And super vice versa, I bet!
I’ve seen the auctioneer getting pretty frustrated
If something good gets under bid
When I went down there
I got pretty damned suspicious
But he seems like a pretty good kid
Yeah, he seems like a pretty good kid
Well, he seems like a pretty good kid!

This joint’s been around for a while
And it feels like the same old crowd each time
But there’s always that chance
Of a shill biddin’ trucker
Trying to help the old man make a dime
There’s one gun guy coming straight out of Texas
Doesn’t keep not one for himself
He’s got a kingdom of gun shops
He likes to decorate 'em
With the trophies of somebody else
Yeah, the trophies of somebody else
Well, the trophies of somebody else!