[Intro: Johnny Drum Machine]
I don't know, do you?

[Chorus: Johnny Drum Machine & Leo The Lion]
It's his lucky day, that's a given
He'll tick the box on the slip and then just watch and learn
He's not addicted, he can stop anytime
But this is gonna pay, he feels it, this one'll be fine

[Verse 1: Mike Skinner]
This time I know I'm gonna smash the bet
I foresee it smacked in the back of the net
Men grip slips, wipe their hands of sweat
The camera pans the away fans end
Twenty quid for Blues to thrash the Reds
Then cash that cash when the ref has said
My mate's out, his pad's a mess
It's getting late, I've not dashed yet
Oi, the question I have to ask myself
Is can I see us not battering them?
If I can't see that happening then
I'm gonna put all my money down on one fat bet

[Pre-Chorus: Mike Skinner]
Now I don't know the first thing about football
But my instincts tell me this is my windfall

[Chorus: Johnny Drum Machine & Leo The Lion]
It's his lucky day, that's a given
He'll tick the box on the slip and then just watch and learn
He's not addicted, he can stop anytime
But this is gonna pay, he feels it, this one'll be fine

[Verse 2: Mike Skinner]
This time I know I would've cashed the lot
I would've held in my hand the whole jackpot
The game's won, the ends have a swap
Two–nil up, they're getting mashed up
But I won't win now, the chance flopped
'Cause I couldn't make it to the damn shop
Might as well put tea in that pot
I've got nowhere else I have to bop
The question I have to ask one
Is how I managed not to manage the trot
Maybe I could phone in and slap it on
Put all my money on a mid-match one

[Pre-Chorus: Mike Skinner]
Yes, I don't know the first thing about football
But my instincts tell me this is my windfall

[Chorus: Johnny Drum Machine & Leo The Lion]
It's his lucky day, that's a given
He'll tick the box on the slip and then just watch and learn
He's not addicted, he can stop anytime
But this is gonna pay, he feels it, this one'll be fine

[Verse 3: Mike Skinner]
Hmm, shit, I'm mad glad I didn't back that match
Supposed to be an unproblematic catch
Full time, the whistle blasted after
And the last passer passed the last pass
Would you believe how we fell back?
Three goals lost in the last half
So glad I was stranded back at the flat
Wincing at every goal we let 'em have
The question I now have to ask
Is how the fuck did we get smashed that bad?
I just very, very nearly, nearly
Lost every penny of all my cash

[Pre-Chorus: Mike Skinner]
Yes, I don't know the first thing about football
And my instincts almost led me to a pitfall

[Chorus: Johnny Drum Machine & Leo The Lion]
It's his lucky day, that was barmy
He didn't tick that box on the slip and what a relief
He's not addicted, he can stop anytime
But next time he will be more lucky, next time he'll be fine
It's his lucky day, that was barmy
He didn't tick that box on the slip and what a relief
He's not addicted, he can stop anytime
But next time he will be more lucky, next time he'll be fine

[Outro: Mike Skinner]
I need to rethink the technique of my betting shit
Maybe change the parameters a little bit
Instead of betting on to win the football
I'll bet to lose the cricket