Life in a city living in L.A.
Is a long way from Huddersfield town
The back of the Rainbow's a long way from heaven
But that's where he gets his pork pie
Limos and ladies they're driving him queasy
Rugby and cricket's unknown
Baseball and football they're making him lazy
Your fan club says "Rodney come home"

The Sheriff of Huddersfield locked in his castle
Look down on Hollywood Hills
The Sheriff of Huddersfield locked in his castle
You're our own Hot Rod on wheels

A good game of arrows a few dozen barrels
The Nautilus rusts in the yard
But for Yorkshire he's yearning but because he's earning
He'll always live in L.A.
A custom made wallet that stays in his pocket
And never comes out to pay bills
He's winning at poker and playing the Joker
And he always cheats when he deals

The Sheriff of Huddersfield locked in his castle
Look down on Hollywood Hills
The Sheriff of Huddersfield locked in his castle
You're our own Hot Rod on wheels

[Rodney's rap:]
Hello, let me introduce myself!
My name is Rodney. I'm immensely strong.
When I were a lad, I could lift up five
Navies on an end of a shovel.
The reason I never took martial arts because
I was immensely fearsome and
I'd probably kill everybody
I came into contact with it.
I was phenomenally strong.
Pride and ego, my lads, pride and ego,
Is what makes the world rotate.
And everybody knows the centre of the universe is Huddersfield
But I don't live there anymore.
I live in Los Angeles.
It's great!... I think

Rufus the red has a crane by his bed
To wrench himself up in the morn'
But if you dare to tread at the foot of his bed
You'll wish you'd never been born.
A bear with a sore head we mean your forehead
He slumbers for most of the day
Wide eyed and legless baked beans for breakfast
Your problem Rodney L.A.

The Sheriff of Huddersfield locked in his castle
Look down on Hollywood Hills
The Sheriff of Huddersfield locked in his castle
You're our own Hot Rod on wheels