(Parody of Candy Man by Sammy Davis Jr.)

Taliban
Hey Taliban

'Allright, everybody down on the ground. The Taliban is here. 'What kid of weapon do you want? Truck bomb, Anthrax, bunkerbuster? Anything you want, we'll get it right tomorrow, cuz we're the Taliban.'

Who can take a Muslim
Fill his brain with poo
Tell him mailing anthrax
Is a groovy thing to do
The Taliban
Oh the Taliban can
The taliban can
Cuz they mix the people up
And make the world look bad

The Taliban takes kids
As young as 8
Tell him that Uncle Sam is Satan
Tell him that the feds in waiting
Don't allow no masturbatin'

They're not hip or cool

Who can take a dimwit
Teach him how to fly
Promise him some virgins
Will be waiting when he dies
The Taliban
Oh the Taliban can

Cuz he thinks hes very special
And he's better than you
The taliban can
Cuz they keep their women down
And make their men go bad.

Oh, man those goofy Taliban, I tell ya. Maybe if they educated their women and took their veils off they wouldn't have so much time to fret. Although, you know, I've never seen the women, so maybe the veils aren't such a bad idea, who knows?