(Parody of Jack and Diane by John Mellencamp)
A little ditty 'bout
Tom and Roseanne
Two really big kids
From the Iowa heartland
Tom want to be a TV star
He didn't have a prayer
Till he bagged Roseanne Barr

She's the biggest hog
In the stable at ABC
If he wants to take a dump
Roseanne makes him ask please
He says hey Rosie
Please don't divorce me
She says waddle out of those hop-sack pants
And get on your knees

Oh yeah the fight goes on
Long after Tom's show
Is no longer on
Oh yeah they say the fight goes
Long after Tom's next show
Also is gone
They never learn


It's such a crock
They're both assholes
Get the bags out
Hide these trolls
Hang onto the headlines
As long as they can
We'll be finding out
Roseanne likes both women and men


Some big titties on both Tom and Roseanne
Two overweight pigs rakin' in the most that they can