(Parody of Monster Mash by Bobby "Boris" Pickett)

I was sitting home alone on Halloween
Waiting for the little ones
With bags on their sleeves
Who love to eat the junk
That make their teeth a big mess
But you see I'm a dentist
I couldn't care less

I'll give them tons of trash
Malted milk balls and candy corn
Chocolate bars and licorice
I'll give them trick-or-treat trash
I'll feed them dextrose glucose
Sweets of all design
I'll make their wisdom teeth stupid
Their eye-teeth blind
I'll let them stuff their faces
Till they've had their fill
Cuz tomorrow
They'll be in my chair and under my drill
I give them tons of trash
Gumdrops and lollipops
Candy canes and gooey chewy things
I feed them trick-or-treat trash
A year will go by
Of fillings and drillings
Root canals bridge work
Appointments and billings
Until next Halloween
When their teeth are all bright
Then I'll put my dentist's costume on
And haunt them all night

I'll give them trash
Lots of trash
How about some giant suck balls
Jaw breakers and gummi bears
I'll give them trick-or-treat trash
Next please
Into the chair now
Open wide
Say Ahh
Aghhh
Now spit