You can have Washington, I'll take New Jersey
You can have London but I want New York City
I should get Providence, I've got a job now
Los Angeles, obvious - that's where you belong now

You can have Africa, Asia, Australia
As long as you keep your hands off Café Pamplona
We can split Germany right down the middle
You'd hate it there anyway
Take Berlin and we'll call it even

You can have all of the carry-on baggage
I'll trade the saskia jokes for the alphabet language
On special occasions we'll split between parents
Who forced us to hate them on alternating weekends

You call it over and I call you psycho
Significant other? Just say we were lovers
And we'll call it even
We'll call it even

I am the ground zero ex-friend you ordered
Disguised as a hero to get past your borders
I know when I'm wanted, I'll leave if you ask me to
Mind my own business and speak when I'm spoken to

I am the tower around which you orbited
I am not proud, I am just taking orders
I fall to the ground within hours of impact
I hit back when hit and attack when attacked

You get Route 2 between Concord and Lexington
I want Mass Ave from the square to my apartment
And if we should meet through some misunderstanding
I'll be very sweet, very patient and forgiving
(Now get off my side of the state)

And if we should see one another in passing
Despite these techniques there is sometimes no avoiding
(There must be some kind of mistake)

We'll raise high our white flags
And bow heads and shake hands
Declaring the land we're on un-American
We'll call it even
We'll call it even

I am the tower around which you orbited
I am not proud, I am just taking orders
I fall to the ground within hours of impact
I hit back when hit and attack when attacked

And I am an accident waiting to happen
I'm laughing like mad as you strangle the captain
My place may be taken, but make no mistake
From a little black box I can say without shame

That you've lost
That you've lost
Do you know what you've lost?

So take whatever you'd like
I'll strike like the States on fire
You won't sleep very tight
No hiding, no safe cover

Make your bed and now lie
Just like you always do
You can fake it for the papers but I'm on to you
I'm on to you

So take whatever you'd like
I'll strike like the States on fire
You won't sleep very tight
No hiding, no safe cover

Make your bed and now lie
Just like you always do
You can fake it for the papers but I'm on to you
I'm on to you
I'm on to you
I'm on to you