(Parody of One of Us by Joan Osborne)


If God had long hair
And a goatee
And if His eyes were pretty glazed
If He looked spaced out
Would you buy His story?
Would you believe
He had an eye infection?

And yeah, yeah, God looks baked
Yeah, yeah, God smells good
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
What if God smoked Cannabis?
Hit the bong like some of us
Drove a Tie-died micro bus
And He subscribes to Rolling Stone

When God made this place
In the beginning
Did He plant any seeds?
Or did He put them there
For Adam and Eve
So they'd be hungry
For the apple that the snake
Was always offering

And yeah, yeah, God rolls great
Yeah, yeah, God smells good
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
What if God smoked Cannabis?
Do you suppose He had a buzz
When He made the platypus?
When He created Earth our home
Does He like Pearl Jam or The Stones?
And do you think He rolls his own?
Up there in Heaven on the throne

And when the Saints go marching home
Maybe He sits and smokes a bowl