All is won to lose again
Gaining strength to use all up
Winning battles to lose the war
I can't smile falsely anymore
Pretending life is full and dear
Born of safety death I fear
Fear to breath to be myself

Why can't I stop this lie?
Why can't I thought I try
Tell me why, I tell lies
Why can't I grow some heavy balls?

Enraged I lay myself
Down to her to do her will
I grind my teeth I ask myself
Where's the life the love the thrill?
You suck the blood right out of me
This isn't how it's meant to be
A shadow of the man I dreamt

Why can't I stop this lie?
Why can't I thought I try
Tell me why, I tell lies
Why can't I grow some heavy balls?

Boredom weighs on empty days
Anger kills the waning will
Anguish hangs like pointed fangs
Grow them, grow them
Grow them, grow them
Grow them

Not long now before I go into the dark infinite
Don't want to kill myself no more
I'm useless, weak, a fucking whore,
Alky fuck, dependent mess
I should be shot I should have less
Last chance now to be a man
So watch me grow these heavy balls

Suck on mine, stuck on mine
Suck on mine, suck em dry
Suck on mine, Suck on mine
Suck on my massive fucking balls

Boredom weighs empty days
Anger kills weaning will
Anguish hangs pointed fangs
Fate is touched twisting guts
Grow them big
Not long now 'fore I go
Into dark infinite
Can't kill myself no more
Useless weak fucking whore
Alky dependent mess
Should be shot should have less
Last chance to be a man
Watch em grow big and bold
Suck on my suck on my
Suck on my suck on my
Suck on my suck on my
Suck on my suck on my
Suck em dry