We are the 801,
We are the central shaft
And we are here to let you take advantage
Of our lack of craft:
Certain streets have certain corners
Sooner or later, we'll turn yours

We are the 801,
We are the central shaft
And thus throughout two years
We've crossed the ocean in our little craft (Row! Row! Row)
Now we're on the telephone,
Making final arrangements (Ding! Ding!)
We are the 801, we are the central shaft

Looking for a certain ratio
Someone must have left it underneath the carpet
Looking up and down the radio
Oh-oh, nothing there this time
Looking for a certain ratio
Someone said they saw it parking in a car-lot
Looking up and down the radio
Oh-oh, nothing there this time
Going back down to the radio
Oh, oh - oh, oh - oh, oh - here we go!

We are the table, the captain's table
Let's get it understood, let's get it understood
We are the losers, we are the bruisers
Let's get it understood, let's get it understood
We are the diners, the final diners
Let's get it understood, let's get it understood
Most of us tinkers, some of us tailors,
And we've got candlesticks, and lots of cocktail sticks
We saw the lovers, the modern lovers
And they looked very good, they looked as if they could
We are the neighbours, the nosy neighbours
We think just like we would, we think just like we should.

Oh, oh oh oh oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh